07 November 1996

Office Worker's Safety Kit

From Your Safety Bureaucracy



ITEM PURPOSE
Hardhat For those surprise directives from on high.
Paper Towels For remediation and cleanup after a suprise directive.
Kneepads To prevent repetitive motion injury while trying to obtain funding for your project.
Rope Won't secure you while out on a limb, but if you push on it instead of pulling, you'll be a "team player."
Safety Shoes To prevent repetitive motion injury while giving performance reviews.
Padded Shorts To prevent repetitive motion injury while receiving performance reviews.
Lip Balm To prevent repetitive motion injury while trying to get a better performance review next year.
Russian Novel To remind you how many times you'll meet the same people in your career — be polite and prosper!

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