VCBC's Museum

As the Web evolves, typography, graphic design, and navigation schemes quickly become dated. Here is a nostalgic look back for the curious, and for those who remember us from years ago.

Ascent of CSS Layout (2007-2016)

Attack of the Graphic Designers (2004—2007)

 The Web Expands (1997—2004)

 Foundation (4 July 1996)

Our mascot is Photoshopped from Tito, in the CHIHUA-L Photo Gallery, by kind permission of Sara Dillon and Dan Levine.

 We used this image at page footers to make wry self-deprecating comments about our writings. Originally he looked like the image at right.

For why we chose a Chihuahua in the first place, see our FAQ.

Some of Our Favorite Comments

Here are some of our favorites among the comments we have received over the years:

Your site was mentioned on a cartoonist's online bulletin board (by a minister cartoonist), and I'd like to applaud the spirit, humor, and intellect behind your words. As an atheist who often shrinks in the company of stern righteousness (secular and otherwise), I felt a positive glow after reading some of your essays... Your words struck with the smack of a punchline, with a residual, thoughtful sting. Great work.

I haven't laughed this hard in weeks! Keep it up; Christ is shining through you in spite of yourself.

I will pray for ALL of you...Im sorry to hear that you are all so lost!!

Bravo, bravo, bravo! I so thoroughly enjoyed everything I read on your website. ...I am a practicing Sufi initiate and a minister in both the Unitarian Universalist and Sufi traditions.
 
When I think of what it took to create this website, I am awed and appreciative. What a work of love!

Non-judgemental, but firm in your beliefs...a rare combination. Everything about this "church" is praiseworthy, especially ye olde Pooper Scooper admitting his own fallibility.

I STILL HOLD TO MY CHRIST AND HE STILL LOVES YOU NO MATTER WHAT YOU THINK OF OTHERS, I WAS ONCE LIKE YOU 10 YEARS AGO. JESUS FORGIVES . WE ALL (YOU TOO) HAVE FALLEN SHORT, BUT I WILL GET UP AGAIN,AND TRY AGAIN.BECAUSE HE HAS DONE SO MUCH FOR ME...

Hooray [for your abortion plank]! I regret that your web site is the only place that I have ever seen this uncomfortable subject treated in a reasonable, intelligent manner. Now, how about a marijuana plank?

How could you be so confused and mixed up. St. Augustine did not "dream up" the idea of the devil. The Bible teaches this! Better stop smokin' that funny stuff.

Thank you for the challenge you offer the Church. Evangelism is not changing opnion but introducing that which changes lives. The "Church" needs a swift kick in the ass when it forgets the great commission to love God and people, is an inclusive proposal.

You need to get a grip. Take some time, STUDY GOD HOLY SOVERIGN WORD!!!! I pray That HE will give you insight to your misconceptions.

... this is exactly what I liked so much about the site: that it is theologically absolutely clean and well done besides the humour. (And I think one wouldn't catch the humour if one wouldn't take the stuff underneath seriously!) Within theological circles your opinions are mainstream (even though usually expressed wthout any humour) and I often wondered how come that the gap between theological academics and Christian people can be so wide ...

Do you have anything to do with dragging Jack van Impe's name through the mud? If you do you are wrong! You guys need mental help!

This is the most refreshing site I have ever seen. Much to sooth the weary soul. (From a clergy person.)

Very intriguing, and it's the best presence of Christianity on the Web that I have ever seen (and believe me, that is quite a compliment to come from me). Based on what I've seen so far, I can appreciate the rather enlightened and healthy attitude you have taken with regard to Christianity, even though I'm not a Christian, myself (I was at one time, and you might be amused to learn that I studied Greek, Hebrew, and archaeological/Biblical history throughout college).

I find the fact that you desecrate the holy Church in such a manor quite and outrage. Chihuahuas have no place in religion

This is a rich, amusing, yet thought-provoking site... As a gay man who used to be a fundamentalist (before I accepted I was gay), I'm heartened to learn that at least some people don't need to equate spiritual purity with hatred of those with different lifestyles. I think it's beautiful. And, I emitted many guffaws while reading your texts. Wonderful!

You have created a brief page on Islam with tons of errors...Either you will accept the truth, or you will dismiss everything but your own opinion as bias... The Jews and Christians of today know about Muhammad, and are required to accept him... By Allah all the blasphemy you people speak is dropping you years into the Hellfire. So fear God and repent... I know because I USED TO BE A CHRISTIAN.

[I went through] your site with fine comb and the more I read it the more I liked it - it is the first time in my experience that such accurate information about Islam was available from a Christian site and your depth of knowledge about Islam also amazed me.

Well done! You put rational thoughts for a caring society; a society with tolerance; and a society that should listen instead of simply screaming the blind platitudes of the leader of the pack...

You are the stupidest peaple I ever heard!

One can see a lot more if one admits he is blind and one can fit a lot better in the Universe if one admits he is small. Because if we all fail in admitting this, none of us will ever see and none of us will ever feel comfortable living even in the vastness of the spiritual and physical cosmos.Thus what better symbolism for such declaration of understanding than a "Blind Chihuahua" in the vastness of the world wide web.

I fear that you are somewhat mislead about Christianity and homosexuality. From what I have read in various translations and transliteration, the teachings are quite clear. Homosexuality is incompatible with the Christian faith. Yes, love the sinner, but it is still clear that homosexuality is sin. Please do not consider this as flaming, rather, I am merely operating on several platforms at once, ranging from political party leader to ordained minister. I ask that you do not reply to this as I am really not interested in a response. I am already repulsed.

Every time I visit VCBC, I wonder why it seems so hard to get our brothers and sisters on the far right to listen. There seems to be a hardening of positions on both the left (what's left of it) and the right to the point that it very likely will come to blows. I see this happening not only in the U.S. but also around to world. Reading your essays and some of the comments brings a little sanity back into my corner of the Universe.

I'm an atheist, and I think that most organized religions are some of the most evil things mankind has managed to produce. Your website, on the other hand, is wonderful. Well, the site's not so hot, but the message is great ;-) I generally dislike/hate/make fun of anyone who believes (or, more often, has been taught that they believe) in God, but you sir, are a gem and should keep on truckin'.

You are a terrific pastoral theologian. That's a biblical theologian's way of saying that you seem to have a great heart for the Gospel in the context of interpersonal relationships, i.e., you know when the Right Answer isn't as good as simply being a servant.

Just had to tell you that I was amazed by the beautiful pictures you have taken!! Your site came up on a search I did for cherry blossoms and your pictures took my breath away.

Thank you for providing a life-giving "virtual" oasis for these less than encouraging times in which we live! Finding VCBC was like getting a suprise gift!

I just returned to the VCBC after many years of being away. The refreshing air and spirit is doing wonders for me. I was rummaging through my computer room and found a dogchurch printout from 1998 and came home. Anyway, when I took physics in college I had a revelation. Consider light. [Maybe God is like] light that acts as both a particle and a wave. The particle is when God aims at and hits, me, one on one, while as a wave He sweeps over everything, very inclusive. Thank you for your web page and Blessings on you.

This is the most idiotic website ive ever seen! You must be a moron to even think of makeing a website this stupid. Im not a person to swear but this website is bloody shit!

Actually fronts for a sophisticated Christian site. Charming nevertheless. - Gene Thursby

Here's a guy who has baptized libertinism and skepticism, and wants to call it faith. No Thanks. - Phil Johnson

Consolidating our Assets

I am transferring the files of The Virtual Church of the Blind Chihuahua (VCBC)  to this blog, in preparation to close down the VCBC's original URL www.dogchurch.org. This change will eliminate expenses for web hosting and domain registration, and allow the pieces of VCBC to remain accessible on the web indefinitely.

Frequently Asked Questions

Do you worship a dog?

No. The Most churches play religion as a team sport, with God as their mascot instead of their Captain. We live our religion, with the Blind Chihuahua as our totem, and God as our co-pilot. (We think God wants us to pilot our own lives, but that God is always available to help. We first saw the phrase "God is my co-pilot" emblazoned on the back of a garbage truck that ran over a neighbor's dog in the 1960's.) The Blind Chihuahua reminds us that "now we see through a glass darkly." — 1 Cor 13:12

What do you mean by "The Courage to be Ridiculous before God?

Conservative churches emphasize that people have gone bad, liberal churches emphasize that people were created good. We emphasize that people are funny, and that God has a sense of humor. "The Courage to be Ridiculous before God" is part of what it takes to admit the truth about ourselves, namely that sometimes, even when we are at our most serious, we humans are just plain silly. This is a form of confession, made endurable, even enjoyable, by humor. It also pokes fun at Paul Tillich's book, The Courage to Be.

What about VCBC's other slogans and its Logo?

"We can't be right about everything we believe. Thank God, we don't have to be," is a re-statement of the mainstream Protestant tenet that the source of Salvation is God, not one's own efforts or opinions. Good works and good opinions are expressions of salvation, not a cause of it. So relax. You don't have to get is exactly right. Which is a good thing, because we humans can't get it exactly right. We are all like little Blind Chihuahuas.

"There is more to Religion than pleasing your Imaginary Friend," is a caution against the idolatry that contaminates belief. In so much of Religion, believers project elements of themselves and their cultures onto their concept of Divinity, and then, based on obedience to that projection, proceed to sin against themselves, their fellow humans, Nature, and God. We recommend a little humility before trying to do God's Service. As we said, we are all like little Blind Chihuahuas.
With that as preamble, the Blind Chihuahua is a totem that does not stand for God. It stands for us. For the evolution of our Logo's appearance, click here.

Is VCBC a real church?

VCBC is a collection of magnetized micro-domains on a hard disk spinning in a vault owned by our web service provider. At your request they are translated into voltage pulses and sent to your computer, which displays them on your screen as colored dots. What your eyes and brain do from there is your business. In other words, VCBC is all in your mind. If your mind is real, that's good enough for us. Right. Here's a serious answer.

Does VCBC have members?

Since every sentient being is a virtual Blind Chihuahua with respect to God (or Ultimate Reality), everyone is a member of The Virtual Church of the Blind Chihuahua. We find that VCBC members are usually:

1. In Denial. Most people are scandalized by VCBC, or would be if they knew about it. They deny that they are members, and we agree with them, so as to reduce church conflict. Since our opinions do not count, this makes them members.
2. In Virtual Reality. Many people like VCBC, or would if they knew about it. In one way or another, they acknowledge that when it comes to God (or Ultimate Reality), we are all like little Blind Chihuahuas, as we said above.
3. In Real Virtuality. Some people do things like recommending VCBC to their friends, giving us money, buying and wearing/displaying our stuff, or posting comments on our blog(s), or even contributing their creative works (in digital format) to our sites. They not only acknowledge their chihuahuahood, they celebrate it. BTW, we are seeking bi-lingual moderators so that we may offer our forum in more languages and provide translations of sites like this one.

Does VCBC have priests?

We have priests, pastors, bishops, metropolitans, popes, imams, yogis, monks, shamans, etc. Your religious credentials are as valid in VCBC as anywhere.

If VCBC is so inclusive, what's with all the Christian stuff?

This (the first, and so far the only) manifestation of VCBC is predominately Christian, because its maintenance person (aka the Pooper Scooper) is Christian. Other manifestations may predominately express other religions. (In the unlikely event that you wish to manifest VCBC in another language or religion, contact us and we'll work something out.) If this website's inclusion of the wisdom of other faiths seems in your eyes to water down its Christianity, try somewhere else. It's a big web and the standard stuff is easy to find.

Then what's the point?

We are all doing our best to be faithful to God according to our various religions. Unfortunately, that best needs help. Look at all the conflict in the world, much of which is about matters of belief. Rather than fight over religion, we want to help each other to be as honest as we possibly can to God, ourselves, each other, and our world. If you respond to this by changing your religion, don't blame us. We are not responsible for what you believe. What you believe is between you and God, even if you're an atheist. Since Fundamentalists think they are responsible for what you believe, which leads them to try to control what you believe, we believe they are legitimate targets for humor, as are we all.

How does VCBC define Christianity?

Lean and mean, like St. Paul: "I knew only Christ, and him crucified." We think that to be a Christian means to experience God through Christ. We believe that Christ was God experiencing life and death (at our hands) as an ordinary guy, and that Christ rose from the dead to lead us to eternal life. However, since those who focus exclusively on the life to come often neglect to care for those they meet in the here and now (think what a jerk Tolstoy was to his wife, for example) we tend to focus on the path immediately ahead of us. We trust God to take care of our ultimate destination.

Does VCBC maintain that the Bible is true?

We believe that every word in the Bible is as intended by God for us to receive, including all the contradictions, redactions, and factual errors which have been noted by the last two centuries of archaeological and literary-historical critical analysis of the Bible and extra-biblical texts. All of those little problems are puzzles for the reader that enhance the Bible's power to awaken the Light of Truth within you. They also serve as a sign that we should worship God, not our Scriptures.

What about the Scriptures of other religions?

God's Truth is infinite, and therefore cannot be confined to any finite string of words, no matter whose Scripture it is. God's Truth is everywhere. It leaks into the Scriptures of religions other than your own. It lives in your personal experience and in your heart. It is stamped into every aspect of the cosmos, and it cannot be confined even to that. And it is a living Truth, who seeks you. You cannot escape it forever.

What are VCBC's politics?

If the shape of the political spectrum can be compared to a dancer's butt, then we have been flatulated up from the center. We vociferously oppose both right-wing and left-wing fundamentalism in politics. We also support the appearance of "None of the Above" on every ballot for elective office.

Who's in charge of VCBC?

Since VCBC manifests itself only on the web, the maintenance person for this site, aka the Pooper Scooper, is in charge. He consults other people on matters of taste, style and content, but ultimately he gets the blame for what goes on here, because he controls the site and writes most of the material. When the time comes, he is counting on God to stop him dead in his tracks.

How long has this been going on?

VCBC was launched on 4 July 1996.

Is VCBC subversive?

Besides being a church, VCBC is also a miniscule conspiracy to help virtues like civility, honesty, kindness, and common sense achieve world domination, one mind at a time. Our weapons are humor and irony guided by faith and reason. We make no apologies, and take no prisoners. Resistance is futile.

Is the Blind Chihuahua theme a send-up of Shoko Asahara, the blind leader of the Aum Shinrikyo cult that released nerve gas into the Tokyo subway?

Absolutely not. The original Blind Chihuahua lived in Austin, Texas in the late 1970's. If we wanted to parody these folks, we would create a ficticious character called Shocko Assahola and run with it. However, since these people are extremely dangerous kooks, we decided to let sleeping dogs lie, as it were.

Is the Virtual Church of the Blind Chihuahua affiliated with any recognizable religious denomination?

This manifestation of VCBC is an unacknowledged, ecumenical boil on the bum of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America. Some have speculated that this is the ELCA's way of attempting to reproduce asexually. Others deny this, on grounds that it would elevate VCBC to the status of bastard child. Most believe that VCBC is a non-serious local infection of the ELCA body politic that will go away by itself.

Did you know there is Another VCBC?

Yup. They're a conservative Baptist congregation just down the road. If you don't like us, maybe you'll like them.

What's with the advertising? Are you just a bunch of capitalist tools?

Actually, Capitalism is one of our tools. We use it because the others don't make any money. If you think we go too far in trying to serve both God and mammon, try visiting The Church of Cash. In any case, our goal for ads, sales, and donations is to pay our web-hosting expenses. If we ever make more than that, we reserve the right to use it for whatever we wish, including but not limited to bicycle parts, books, chocolate and beer. Oh, maybe a nice dessert wine, or even a shrubbery.

Is the Virtual Church of the Blind Chihuahua affiliated in any way with Taco Bell?
 
No. Our Chihuahua appeared first, and ours always wears dark glasses, speaks without an accent, and has a penis. (Taco Bell's Chihuahua is a female cross-dresser.) The Blind Chihuahua displays his penis to honor those religionists who behave as if that organ were an antenna that lets the bearer hear directly from God. We suggest that they try another channel.

Some Favorite Quotations

 

Self-interest

"... what souls are these that run through this black haze?"
And he to me: "These are the nearly soulless
whose lives concluded neither blame nor praise.

They are mixed here with that despicable corps
of angels who were neither for God nor Satan,
but only for themselves. The High Creator

scourged them from Heaven for its perfect beauty,
and Hell will not receive them since the wicked
might feel some glory over them."

— Dante, Inferno III,29-48, John Ciardi, trans., Mentor Books, 1952, 1982.

"Half the harm that is done in this world is due to people who want to feel important. They don't mean to do harm — but the harm does not interest them. Or they do not see it, or they justify it because they are absorbed in the endless struggle to think well of themselves."" — T. S. Eliot (1888-1965)

 

Church & State

The sword and crook are one, and only evil
can follow from them when they are together;
for neither fears the other, being one.

— Dante, Purgatorio XVI,110-112, John Ciardi, trans., Mentor Books, 1952, 1982.

 

Preaching

You mortals do not walk a single way
in your philosophies, but let the thought
of being acclaimed as wise lead you astray.

Yet Heaven bears even this with less offense
than It must feel when It sees Holy Writ
neglected, or perverted of all sense.

You do not count what blood and agony
planted it in the world, nor Heaven's pleasure
in those who search it in humility.

Each man, to show off, strains at some absurd
invented truth; and it is these the preachers
make sermons of; and the Gospel is not heard.

— Dante, Paradiso XXIX,85-96, John Ciardi, trans., Mentor Books, 1952, 1982.

 

The Big Picture

Oh grace abounding that had made me fit
to fix my eyes on the Eternal Light
until my vision was consumed in It!

I saw within Its depth how It conceives
all things in a single volume bound by Love,
of which the universe is the scattered leaves...

— Dante, Paradiso XXXIII,85-90, John Ciardi, trans., Mentor Books, 1952, 1982.

 

War

Oh shame to men! Devil with Devil damn'd
Firm concord holds, men only disagree
Of creatures rational, though under hope
Of Heavenly Grace: and God proclaiming peace,
Yet live in hatred, enmity, and strife
Among themselves, and levy cruel wars,
Wasting the earth, each other to destroy:
As if (which might induce us to accord)
Man had not hellish foes enow besides,
That day and night for his destruction wait.

— John Milton, Paradise Lost, II, 496-505, 1667

War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things. The decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feeling which thinks that nothing is worth war is far worse. The person who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which is more important than his own personal safety, is a miserable creature and has no chance of being free unless made and kept so by the exertions of better men than himself. — John Stewart Mill

 

Faith & Reason

Without reason we would not know how to apply the insights of faith to the concrete issues of living. The worship of reason is arrogance and betrays a lack of intelligence. The rejection of reason is cowardice and betrays a lack of faith. — Abraham Joshua Heschel, God in Search of Man, 20, 1955

The Greeks learned in order to comprehend. The Hebrews learned in order to revere. The modern man learns in order to use. — Abraham Joshua Heschel, God in Search of Man, 34, 1955

Religious thinking is in perpetual danger of giving primacy to concepts and dogmas and to forfeit the immediacy of insights, to forget that the known is but a reminder of God, that the dogma is a token of His will, the expression of the inexpressible at its minimum. Concepts, words must not become screens; they must be regarded as windows. — Abraham Joshua Heschel, God in Search of Man, 116, 1955

It is impossible for a man to begin to learn what he thinks he knows. — Epictetus

If you shut your door to all errors, truth will be shut out. — Rabindranath Tagore

 

Faith & Humor

God is a comic, playing to an audience that's afraid to laugh." — Voltaire
Thanks to Rev. Janet Sunderland, August 2001 Newsletter, Church of Antioch, Kansas City

"When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realized that the Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me." - John Howard, past Olympian, ultracyclist, and Ironman Triathlon world champ

 

Inanimate Things

Inanimate objects are dead in relation to man; they are alive in relation to God. — Abraham Joshua Heschel, God in Search of Man, 97, 1955

 

Ultimate Concern

Certainly God is more than "a name for that which concerns man ultimately." Only saints are ultimately concerned with God. What concerns most of us ultimately is our ego. The Biblical consciousness begins not with man's, but with God's concern. The supreme fact in the eyes of the prophets is the presence of God's concern for man and the absence of man's concern for God. — Abraham Joshua Heschel, God in Search of Man, 127, 1955

 

The Body of Christ

If we despise our brother, our worship is unreal, and forfeits every divine promise. When we come before God with our hearts full of contempt, and unreconciled with our neighbors, we are, both individually and collectively, worshipping an idol.... Not just our own anger, but the fact that someone has been hurt, damaged, or disgraced by us, who "has a cause against us," erects a barrier between us and God. Let us therefore as a Church examine ourselves, and see whether we have not often enough wronged our fellow men. Let us see whether we have tried to win popularity by falling in with the world's hatred, its contempt and its contumely. For if we do that, we are murderers. Let the fellowship of Christ so examine itself today, and ask whether, at the hour of prayer and worship, any accusing voices intervene and make its prayer vain. — Dietrich Bonhoeffer, The Cost of Discipleship, 144-145, 1937.

 

Duty

It is our duty as human beings to proceed as though the limits of our capabilities do not exist. — Pierre Teilhard de Chardin (1881-1955)
Thanks to Kay Goodnow

All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing. — Edmund Burke (1729-1797)

 

Studying without a Teacher

Too often we put saddlebags on Jesus and let the donkey run loose in the pasture. — Rumi, The Essential Rumi, Coleman Barks, trans., 256.
Thanks to Christopher Hoover.

 

Specialization

A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, design a building, write a sonnet, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, solve equations, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects. — Robert Heinlein, The Notebooks of Lazarus Long.

 

Business

The way you train the high-flying administrators, the mandarins, can be summed up in one sentence. It is to train people to be at ease with their consciences when they take decisions about things they do not understand. — Alan Dickinson (quoted in Rhodes, Deadly Feasts)

Many companies are attracted by a fantasy version of empowerment and simultaneously repelled by the reality. How lovely to have energetic, dedicated workers who always seize the initiative (but only when 'appropriate'), who enjoy taking risks (but never risky ones), who volunteer their ideas (but only brilliant ones), who solve problems on their own (but make no mistakes), who aren't afraid to speak their minds (but never ruffle any feathers), who always give their very best to the company (but ask no unpleasant questions about what the company is giving them back). How nice it would be, in short, to empower workers without actually giving them any power. — Peter Kizilos

 

Government

It covers the surface of society with a network of small complicated rules, minute and uniform, through which the most original minds and the most energetic characters cannot penetrate, to rise above the crowd. The will of man is not shattered, but softened, bent, and guided; men are seldom forced by it to act, but they are constantly restrained from acting. Such a power does not destroy, but it prevents existence; it does not tyrannize, but it compresses, enervates, extinguishes, and stupefies a people, till each nation is reduced to nothing better than a flock of timid and industrious animals, of which the government is the shepherd. — Alexis de Tocqueville, Democracy in America, Volume II, Chapter 4, Section 6, "What Sort of Despotism Democratic Nations Have to Fear"

It's unwise to pay to much, but it's worse to pay to little. When you pay too much you lose a little money — that is all. When you pay too little, you sometimes lose everything, because the thing you bought was incapable of doing the thing it was bought to do. The common law of business balance prohibits paying a little and getting a lot — it can't be done. If you deal with the lowest bidder, it si well to add something for the risk you run. And if you do that, you will have enough to pay for something better. — John Ruskin 1819-1900

Half the harm that is done in this world is due to people who want to feel important. They don’t mean to do harm, but the harm does not interest them, or they do not see it, or they justify it because they are absorbed in the endless struggle to think well of themselves. - T. S. Eliot

Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote! - Benjamin Franklin

 

Language

The basic tool for the manipulation of reality is the manipulation of words. If you can control the meaning of words, you can control the people who must use the words. — Philip K. Dick (1928- 1982)

It depends on what the meaning of the word "is" is. — William Jefferson Clinton

When ideas fail, words come in very handy. — Goethe

 

Truth

In an age of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act. — George Orwell
Thanks to Jay Nelson, Church of Antioch, Albuquerque, who uses it as a an e-mail signature.

As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of the demand. — Josh Billings

 

Vanity

I went out of that gallery and into another and still larger one, which at the first glance reminded me of a military chapel hung with tattered flags. The brown and charred rags that hung from the sides of it, I presently recognized as the decaying vestiges of books. They had long since dropped to pieces, and every semblance of print had left them. But here and there were warped boards and cracked metallic clasps that told the tale well enough. Had I been a literary man I might, perhaps, have moralized upon the futility of all ambition. But as it was, the thing that struck me with keenest force was the enormous waste of labour to which this somber wilderness of rotting paper testified. At the time, I will confess that I thought chiefly of the Philosophical Transactions and my own seventeen papers upon physical optics. - H.G. Wells, in The Time Machine as quoted at the end of Al Garcia's publication list.

I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: "Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them on the sand,
Half sunk, a shattered visage lies, whose frown
And wrinkled lip and sneer of cold command
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed.
And on the pedestal these words appear:
`My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings:
Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!'
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare,
The lone and level sands stretch far away". - Percy Bysshe Shelley, "Ozymandias"

 

Progress

It is astounding to realize that perhaps half of all human knowledge has been discovered or created in the past century. But then again, so has half the bullshit. — Mrs. Scooper, circa 1988

There is a kind of stupidity with which even the Gods struggle in vain. — Schiller

 

Equality

The demand for equality has two sources: one of them is among the noblest, the other is the basest of human emotions. The noble source is the desire for fair play. But the other source is the hatred of superiority. At the present moment it would be very unrealistic to overlook the importance of the latter.

There is in all men a tendency (only corrigible by good training from without and persistent moral effort from within) to resist the existence of what is stronger, subtler, or better than themselves. In uncorrected and brutal small men this hardens into an implacable and disinterested hatred for every kind of excellence…

Equality (outside mathematics) is a purely social conception. It applies to man as a political and economic animal. It has no place in the world of the mind. Beauty is not democratic; she reveals herself more to the few than to the many, more to the persistent and disciplined seekers than to the careles. Virtue is not democratic; she is achieved by those who persue her more hotly than most men. Truth is not democratic; she demands special talents and special industry in those to whom she gives her favors.

Political democracy is doomed if it tries to extend its demand for equality into these higher spheres. Ethical, intellectual, or aesthetic democracy is death. A truly democratic education - one which will preserve democracy - must be, in its own field, ruthlessly aristocratic, shamelessly "high-brow." — C. S. Lewis, "Democratic Education" (1944)

Commandments, Virtues & Sins

In case you need a reminder, here is an abridgement of the first ten (of 613) statements of law from the Hebrew Bible (Old Testament):

The Ten Commandments
No worshipping gods other than God. No worshipping human creations. No disrespecting God's name. No working on the Sabbath. No disrespecting parents. No killing. No adultery. No stealing. No lying to harm another. No wanting another's spouse or possessions.

You might also find it helpful to remember:

Theological Virtues	Cardinal Virtues	Capital Virtues	Capital Sins
Faith Hope Charity	Prudence Justice Temperance Fortitude	Humility Liberality Fraternity Meekness Chastity Temperance Diligence	Pride Avarice Envy Wrath Lust Gluttony Sloth

Top Fallacies about Christianity

Christians wouldn't welcome someone like me into their Church.

That depends on which Christians. Have you ever walked into a church whose members were a different color than you? Blending in is not always an option during what Martin Luther King called "the most segregated hour in America." But in general, the more authentically Christian the congregation, the more welcome you will find yourself. And remember, most Christian churches wouldn't welcome the historical Jesus either, but we're trying to get better about that.

Christianity is just a cult like any other.

Christianity began as the quintessential anti-cult. Consider that cults usually wind up killing their followers and their opponents. Christianity began with outsiders killing the leader. The followers were neither homicidal nor suicidal, nor were they asked to be. They were emboldened with a miraculous courage to proclaim the Truth as they understood it. Christianity really is about getting in touch with God, not rallying around a psychopath (which is what cults are about).

I can be a Christian without attending Church.

From its beginning, Church has always been understood as community. Even ascetic hermits who meditated alone for years had their influence on the unfolding Church. In other words, if you are called to Christianity, you are called to make yourself known to the Church and the Church to you.

Modern day Christians are mostly Televangelists and their viewers.

Hardly. When my pastor was asked about Televangelism, he replied, "When was the last time a TV screen handed you the wine and the wafer (the elements of the Eucharist or Holy Communion)?"

I can be "spiritual" without being "religious."

Without a normative tradition to stand for or against, you can engage in what Bellah, et al. in Habits of the Heart, called Sheilaism. Sheilaism a hyper-individualistic "my-way" of dealing with one's religious impulses, named for a woman whom the authors interviewed. As such, it does not build institutions that shape societies, which is one of the functions of religion, but it may tear them down, which would be a demonic perversion of religion. In other words, your individualistic faith will do nothing for your world. Even Jesus stood in relation to the normative tradition of his day.

Christianity is not relevant to a technological world.

"Of all the dispositions and habits which lead to political prosperity, religion and morality are indespensable supports....Where is the security for property, for reputation, for life, if the sense of religious obligation desert the oaths which are the instruments of investigation in courts of justice? And let us with caution indulge the supposition that morality can be maintaned without religion. Whatever may be conceded to the influence of refined education on minds of peculiar structure, reason and experience both forbid us to expect that national morality can prevail in exclusion of the religious principle." — George Washington's farewell address.

There is not one mention of technology in that statement, which remains as true today as when Washington spoke it over two centuries ago. In other words, technology is not relevant to the human need for religion.

All Christians are hypocrites.

So? Do you know of any religion or ethical system whose adherents are not hypocrites to some extent? At least Christianity recognizes this and makes room for it with the doctrine of the Forgiveness of Sin.

Christians can't let themselves have any fun.

Yeah, right. Like we never have any fun here. A humorless faith is an idolatrous faith. If it ain't ever any fun, its probably a foul fantasy.

All Christians are conservative.

Actually, the dominant movements in world Christianity are liberal, like the World Council of Churches. Christians come in all political persuasions. Just pick a congregation in tune with where you are now, and enjoy.

Religion is a sham for the weak-minded.

It's not a sham. It is a constructive way of living with our religious impulses. Basically, religion is for those of us who can't get along without God. Of course our minds are weak, compared to say, God's Mind. So are our bodies and our souls. We participate in religion to connect with our source of strength.

There is no hard evidence for Christianity or any religion.

So... You are convinced without proof that empirical evidence is necessary for you to believe in, or trust in, anything. How long have you had this delusion? How long have you denied all the things you do accept without proof just to get through each day? In our world, the world God gave to us, we live by proof. In God's World, the world to come, we live by faith. It is our job to live in both worlds at once. Trust me, it takes a some common sense.

Statement of Belief

I believe that the members of the VCBC believe all kinds of different things.
I believe that what I believe is not nearly as important for you as what you believe.
I believe that what I believe is not ultimately important even for me, because I refuse to commit the idolatry of worshipping my own opinions (some of which must be wrong, because I am human).

I believe the following, common to most faith traditions:

Organized religion tames the idea of God (or Ultimate Reality) to support its existence and to affirm its cultural milieu. This is a leading cause of atheism.

God is one. Truth is one. We are one. We need love, honesty, and faith to get ourselves together. Since all truth is God's Truth, any honest method of inquiry, pursued faithfully, with loving regard for the subject, will point toward God. This includes science, which can serve to correct our idolatrous beliefs.

Being human means being on our own, free to become ourselves without reference to God. To enable this, God makes the universe work according to rational principles, which means that God does not fix things when they don't work out the way we want.

We think we are human beings who occasionally have spiritual experiences, but we are really spiritual beings who are here to have human experiences. When we think we are the only spiritual beings in our world we deceive ourselves.

The spirit of God creates, sustains, pervades, participates in, and transcends, everything.

I believe the following, specific to Christianity:

God, for love of us, became an ordinary person — Jesus — to be with us as one of us. People just like us — which means that we are just like them — killed him because he did not conform to their beliefs about God.

Belief is an act of embracing opinions, which becomes idolatry when our opinions about God become more important to us than our relationship with God (i.e., when we crucify Christ).

Jesus arose from death — an act by which God not only forgives us for being like his murderers, but promises to bring us into a new relationship with God beyond our present lives. This act is powerful enough to redeem the entire universe.

I further believe that Christianity, Judaism, and Islam are different ways to worship the same God, see below.

I believe that because the moral teachings of the world's major religions are summarized in passages like these (from the Bible):

"And what doth the Lord require of thee, but to do justice, to love kindness, and to walk humbly with thy God?"

"Thou shalt love the Lord, thy God, with all thine heart, with all thy mind, and with all thy strength... Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself."

we need to quit fighting over the details of what we believe.

Parish Bylaws

There are 613 Commandments (Mitzvot) in the Hebrew Bible (Old Testament), of which a normal person keeps less than the first Ten.
Most folks even fall short of the spirit of the Law as summarized by Jesus and Rabbi Hillel:

You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your resources, and you shall love your neighbor as yourself.

So a few more rules are unlikely to do any good, but they probably won't do any harm either. Forthwith, in addition to the Biblical Commandments, we adopt the following Bylaws:

1. Hold your beliefs firmly, but gently. You are not your beliefs. Ultimately, it is you that God loves and judges, rather than merely your beliefs. Beliefs are only a way of verbalizing about religion, not its content. The experience of God's presence is the content.
   
   
2. Be gentle with the beliefs of others. Otherwise you may miss an opportunity to gain a new perspective on your own faith which, if your faith is genuine, will only broaden and deepen it. Moreover, you will drive away people who may need to partake of the spritual gifts you have to offer, if you insist on only your own terms.
   
   
3. Every once in a while, when you assert, "I believe ..." ask yourself just exactly who is believing. After all, if you don't even know who you are, you should be very cautious in making assertions about who God is. This exercise may help you refrain from projecting your inner demons onto God when you are witnessing to others.
   

The Curse of the Blind Chihuahua

The Virtual Church of the Blind Chihuahua™ (VCBC), having no authority, power, or even existence beyond the virtual, reserves the right to curse those whom it deems necessary to punish for their bad behavior. Among these are abusers of religion, people, animals, and our environment, both real and virtual. As examples we curse terrorists, dictators, animal neglectors, litterbugs, malicious hackers, and spammers.

Our curse relies on the miracle of transubstantiation. As the Catholic Church asks God to change the spiritual "substance" of the Communion bread and wine into the Body and Blood of Christ, so do we beseech God to inflict a less palatable miracle of transubstantiation on those whom we curse. Let the last three drops of every swallow of liquid they drink be transubstantiated into the urine of the Blind Chihuahua for as long as they live, or until they repent.

Amen.

Some examples of those accursed:

• Usama Bin Laden - for killing thousands in the name of his bastardization of Islam, and for convincing others to do likewise
• Kim Jong Il - for making nuclear weapons and missiles the only viable economic activities in North Korea
• Robert Mugabe - for starving Zimbabwe in the name of his personal amalgamation of Communism and Racism
• Clerics who teach that democracy and/or science is incompatible with their religion - for loving power and control more than truth
• Clerics who abuse their laity, whether physically, sexually, emotionally, or intellectually - for trading their relation to the Divine to do the work of its opposite
• Laity who abuse their clergy without just cause - for punishing a clerics who don't meet the demands of their dark side
• Anyone who persecutes people because of their ethnicity or religion - for dumbing down the definition of a human person to mean someone like themselves
• Faith-based organizations who lend aid and comfort to those attempting the destruction of other faith-based organizations, such as the World Council of Churches and the Presbyterian Church USA (PCUSA).